I don't know what to say. Shit's going down hill fast. I think I may need to explain.
Last night, he was here. Outside my window, rapping on the glass like nothing. At first I thought it to be a tree branch, but then I heard the voice. He was singing. The Tall Guy, staring at me at work, and who followed Julienne and I to Chicago, was outside my fucking window, singing. And I don't mean fucking classics, he was singing a song I havn't heard since my sister moved out when I was 12. As odd as it seems, I recall it as 'Goodnight Deamonslayer' by Voltaire (I'll link it at the end); it's a damned lullaby.
I have no idea as to why this man was singing this, or how, because I havn't even touched the iceburg of crazy yet. He's got no face.
No eyes, mouth, nose, ears, nothing. When I saw this fact, I screamed. I screamed so loud. I screamed hoping it would leave. He just kept singing.
Which brings me back to my point of how does something with no face sing?
I've been reading a man named M's blog. He seems to be having the same problems, but on a different level. If we are anything alike, then only hell know's what to happen to me next. I want his help. I need his help.
Julienne and Erin are seeing it. The man in the suit. Every day when Juls comes to pick me up from work, it's there. He's always out far in the parking lot, in plain sight, yet no one acknowledges him. Not the guys on security duty in the managers loft, not the customers, no one. Except of course Juls and I. Why can no one see him? You would think a god damned eight foot tall man in a suit would be noticeable.
Oh, and there's the fact he has no face.
Regardless, I'm getting freaked out a bit.
I watched that Marble Hornets shit too, by the way (maybe my paranoia is being supplied by that? I'm unsure). While it was entertaining in a horrific kind of way, I feel like.... it's mocking me. Why would you make joke videos of something so serious? (also disregarding the fact they [creaters] are more than likely closeted 4chan members on top of being SA posters. But I digress) I find it so mocking. This shit has been following me for weeks now, follwing Julienne. I'm worried it's going to get to Erin soon. She may be strong, but I will not let her get involved moreso into this than she has to be. Juls on the other hand has made it painstakingly clear he will not let me face this alone. It's almost romantic, him like that of my Prince Charming.
Ignoring the fact Julienne is 100% gay. Wishful thinking in an awkward, terrified, and lonely kid of way.
I have winter break by the end of this week. I'm hoping to skip town for awhile by then. Julienne and I both are considering running, without Erin. I love her, and she's like my sister. She can't come with us. She won't come with us. She told me the other day she sees the Tall guy following me. She seems disturbed by it, moreso than myself. I want her out of this before she's in too deep. I read M's blog a few weeks back talking about making allies, only to 'infect' (the term he uses) them into this. Which brings me to a greater point.
Why and how was I infected? This shit was subtly happening even before MH was sent to me. The Tall guy was watching me since Augest or September. So why is he now just scaring me?
I've got enough money saved to make it months ($1200 total, fuck yeah saving for years and partial help from dad!), and Juls has got some spare as well; he also has a running car, which is more than I can account for. The only issue we're having now of skipping town would be our parents. I love my dad, and I can't let something happen to him. I've got a mom down south, who I could give about half a shit to. Julienne's got his Aunt, but she's gone a lot on business .
I guess we wouldn't be leaving much. Just Erin and dad. Do I really want to leave them behind? In the end, isn't it for the best...?
I have conflicting feelings. Fucking teenage girl kicking in.
I'll have my decision by Friday.
Here is 'Goodnight Deamonslayer'. I could not listen to it, it's so different from the Tall man's voice. He was so scratchy. And dark. Not deep, just... dark. I have no words to describe it. Either way, enjoy..?